ek joota to hai na… !!!


Was just chatting with a very dear friend who thinks I cant be mean to anyone and I was hell bent upon proving I can be quite a Kamina if I want… only here I am at my best behaviour… !! Whilst trying to show her my mean & wild & unsensible streak I remembered a few events of the past…


but first a lil background…


This was at our Adda… we call it Anna’s as it was a kerala store run by a guy called Joy (for us in gujarat all South Indians are generally Anna or Anni its a losely used term.!),  I have written a lil more about our adda here.


We all were in our early 20’s then… well most were… we werent all class mates but all who used to frequent that adda… from morning to late night… some were working some were studying some like me were finding a job or some were in between two jobs… all young… a few committed and mostly bachelors… !!!! Our group would have been anywhere from 15 members to 30 members… though all would only get together either in the evenings or in the party… but about 5-10 would be at the adda at any given time… so if you had nothing to do… you could be assured of company at Anna !!!


It being a adda on the street obviously you would have a few who would incessentaly join the group and hang around who you dont want… but our group was quite looking forward to such guys… !! They would be the scapegoats… for buying free cigarettes.. or pepsi’s or practical joke targets… !!!


One such guy was Vishal (name changed) now Vishal was a simple enough bloke had done his polytechinic and was working on contract basis in a towel company. He had a serious inferiority complex with English.. he came from the Ghanchi community… and people from that community usually use a very rough gujarati language that is always fully decorated with lots of colourful words… He used to  regularly at our adda as his job was in shifts, his times would change.. but he would be there most certainly….. 


Eventually he joined… and would join on bouts to drink… on bouts to bathe in the Narmada… on to matches of cricket… on to everything…


In about a month it was noticed that he wanted to be in the group… where as most didnt like him… so suddenly someone would tap on his shoulder and say

“Kya Vishal maine dekha hai… tu kabhi cigarette pilata hi nahi”

suddenly someone would add..

“ha yaaar… yeh saala kabhi paise nahi nikalta..”

the third one would join…

“arre… iska naam to Bhikhu hona chahiye…” (Bhikhu being short for Bhikhari… Bhikhari meaning Beggar..)

before anyone would realise his name became Bhikhu…


Everyone would taunt him… and he would try his best to save his money… but the guys had caught his nerve…. he would be teased more and more… so much torture… He was given a lot of raw deals… at times we  would hold him and forced to empty his wallet…. He would always be made to bat 11th and not get any over in the whole match… !! made to carry the water jug on outings …


Everyone would ask for his yamaha… and he always would be reluctant to give.., but would eventually have to give in… people would empty his petrol tank… When we would go to the river to bath… they would particularly force his head in the water… he would be the target of everyone… some one would pour a pouch of water in his clothes.. some one would engage him in talks and suddenly a Sutli Bomb would burst between his legs… but he wouldnt go… he was to stay put…


One day he went to get BENADRYL cough syrup for his house.. on the way back he came to our adda for a smoke.. we were about 5-7 guys there… some one noticed that he had a bottle in his pocket..

“abe quarter leke kaha jaa raha hai..”

he retorted its cough syrup… me sudddenly said…

“hey i have a mild cough… gimme a sip.. !”

he didnt want to give… so another guy…

“abe saale woh dawa maang raha hai… saale maine tujhe kitne ki daaru pilai hai ab tak..”

senti kar ke that guy gave the bottle to me.. !! I took a sip… another friend coughed.. “mujhe bhi”

before he knew the bottle was emptied.. everyone had a sip.. and he had to buy another bottle…


Some how it was pleasure… just coz it was grief to him… !!


However on one insane night a friend gave a birthday party in Shalimar Hotel in Ankleshwar… then the best hotel in our district… with drinks..!!!!!


a party with drinks was big…

In Gujarat… a dry state…

For the drinkers.. free ki daroo to …

A place to sit and drink… without fear of the police… no need to find an empty house either… !!!

 for people like me it was free ka entertainment… i woudl drnik lots of coke with ice and lots of biting and than enjoy the antics of the drunk….


Have you noticed how the drunk always keep repeating…

Saale Sach Bol raha hu… tujhe lagta hai ke mujhe chad gayi hai… but such mein…

Tu mera sabse acha dost hai yaa… !!!


ROFL !!!


anyways the party was in a hall and it started at 9 and after about 12 or so (it was december) it was quite chilly… in the hall music was playing… all stags… so dancing… lots of smoke… throwing of things… running… beating… eveyrthing… !!!!!


somehow this Bhikhu was staying away from most things… scared… he knew if he would try and tease anyone he would be made a big scapegoat…


Another friend Imran caught hold of him at one juncture… and for no fault of him… the Bhikhu was stripped… and kicked out of the hall… !!! It was late night…. thankfully not a lot of people were around, only security guards etc…. and he went and ran for the bushes… !!! Stripped meaning no clothes at all… !! no undies… !!!!


having pushed him out was not enough.. coz he was behind bushes… so they grabbed water bottles to target him… eventually the guy fought and cried… and eventually sanity prevailed and all of us were kicked out of the hotel with him in clothes… some how some one hid his shoes which we couldnt find… the friend who gave a party was scared to death as the hotel management warned to complain to his dad.. !!!


eventually all went home…


next day this Bhikhu comes to me and tells me amongst 7 other friends… one among them took his shoes….

“Dhiren… kal raat ko jo hua… theek hai… sab bewde the… mujhe nanga kiya… theek hai… masti main chalta hai… but kisika nuksaan to nahi hona chahiye na… mere Rs. 2400 ke woodland ke shoes gayab ho gaye uska kya ????”


Trust me all 7 were for a second shocked.. !!!!!!


Was he real… !! after so much igonminy…. all he was worried about was 2400 rs…. !!!


Eventually the guy who took his shoes remembered they were in the boot of his car….. !! but unfortunately we found only one shoe… !!!!!!!


so our great friend… proceeded and gave him the one shoe… and gave him some RS. 100 ka currency notes !!!!!!!!


Bhikhu : Yeh to sirf 1200 hai…

 Our friend : Ha to… ek joota to hai na… chal bhaag saale…


the bugger took the 1200 but finally that was the end of him… !!!!!!!!


Geeeeez… Things we had to do to get rid of people… !!!!!! If only we knew just stealing one shoe would do it…. !!!! There were a few others… and a few other weird stories…  but I think this much of reputation harm is enough… :mrgreen:




Coming to think of it… I have come a long long long long long way… from those days…

62 thoughts on “ek joota to hai na… !!!

    • Rakesh says:

      I like these weekend posts… Nobody here, I’m in office :)) he he…

      I can come first at least 5 times…

      First just came first, now read the post and still first…

      • Rakesh says:

        But this is crazy Dhiren, seriously. I mean, we had a group and any newcomer would be made fun of but it never went to this extent.

        He might be made the scapegoat of all jokes but still in cricket, he would bat on merit and bowl on merit. There were a few exceptions like me though 😉 who always used to get batting and bowling he he…

        So agree – We all are Kaminas but You’re the greatest 😀 he he…

        Strange now that you’d go to this extent to prove you’re a Kamina (Is it just because Kaminey is a superhit)!!!

        • hitchwriter says:

          recently I and monu were also discussing the same thing…

          the dark side is there inside all of us… whether we acknowledge or not… thats what we both loved about Kaminey… 😀

          I am a Kamina and I accept… 😈 never run from that fact… !! However I have been domesticated to quite an extent… !! 😦 😦

          I also always batted and bowled… but some people were made to always field… especially in non serious matches… !!!

          It was one hell of a crazy time… dude… senseless… and touchwood we all came out of it unharmed… !!!

          • Rakesh says:

            we all came out unharmed, not so sure about that Vishal…

            The thing is inspite of letting it out here, when you meet him in Bharuch next, try saying ‘Sorry’ he he…

            But I mean, even he has the nerve to come back and say – Nanga kiya, theek hai but paise ka nuksaan???

            What did he actually say – let’s hear it in his colourful language 🙂

            • hitchwriter says:

              ha ha ha

              our language is most colourfully decorated… !! always… !! but this is a public site… and so many female readers… !!!!

              we did come out of it unharmed…

              that Vishal was a nerd… but he married a physiotherapist and rests in New Zealand… !!!!

              He would be thrilled to meet me i m sure… He got the Rs. 1200 and his shoe back !!!!

          • Rakesh says:

            Yeah, free in the afternoons, have a good lunch and go off to sleep for a good 2 to 3 hours. Then wake up and take family out to a mall or a children’s play area! Wish the weather was better to go to the beach or parks…

            But though I’m not a Muslim, I love Ramadan 😀

            • hitchwriter says:

              I love Ramzan too… !!

              I Bharuch we have this area Bhatar Waad… after 10 whole night they serve the bestest of chicken on road… its completely abuzz even at 2-4 in the night… !! its fantastic… !!!!!!

              and infact we have noted that more than the muslims it was us hindu’s who would hog the market eating and devouring food.. !!!

  1. sraboneyghose says:

    Dhiren, I admire your guts for making public this crazy behaviour of yours but as you said in one of your comments, everybody has a dark and mean side…I’m glad you are domesticated now…Even though I think Vishaal was a loser for coming back for his shoes after what happened, I still feel sorry for him…

    • hitchwriter says:

      Well sraboney it happened.. I aint denying it.. part of my growing up… whats there is there.. i cant change it…

      I was apprehensive if i should post or not… but well… i hope my readers know me well enough now…

      There are many things about Vishal that i couldnt fit in this post…

      trust me he was a nerd… having said that … i understand what happened was extreme…

  2. Pixie says:

    don’t know whether to laugh or say very bad hitchu!

    I had classmates who used to get drunk on cough syrup!

    But, getting him naked and stealing his shoes was a bit of an extreme na?!
    But, seriously, that guy also seems like such a loser! 😀

    (sorry bhai, but, he does!)

    • hitchwriter says:

      SAy very bad… !!

      Its supposed to show I can me as mean as anyone can get…

      we too had classmates in hostel who would get drunk on cough syrup… even cheaper was Dexovon / Proxywon… a few tablets and your totall bewda !!!!

      it was extreme… !! he is a winner today… living a happy life in New Zealand !!

    • hitchwriter says:

      if you ask my honest opinion… he was happy one got lost he got 1200

      all guys regretted it… but once he came and asked for money… everyone stopped regretting it…

  3. Sandhya says:

    You HAVE guts, Dhiren to narrate this incident so much in detail, here. Thank god, that guy Vishal is living a normal life. These types of acts affect the individual’s whole life, Dhiren.

    I have come across stories like this from my husband also, so it is not shocking. Thank god, you are a normal person now! We, women never have stories like this, how come? We are always conditioned to be polite, patient, submissive…..altogether, GOOD daughters, sisters, wives and mothers.

    You are a number ONE writer, Dhiren. No doubt about it.

    • hitchwriter says:

      Sandhya I knew you would not like it.. !! its not something to be proud of.. but i dont see any point in denying experiences of life… its not a good experience.. but still its happened..

      Girls have such stories too… they are more discreet !! seriously !!

      • Solilo says:

        All girls are not discreet. I openly admit to drinking and Beer washing my hair since the age of 16. Also mentioned out 5 girls in Kodaikanal trip.

        But no cruelty like this. Poor loser Vishal! Ha..ha..ha..

      • Sandhya says:

        Yes, it is not easy to digest. But as I told you, my husband has got stories like this. My sons might have! But when we read about this from the horse’s mouth, god, it looks very harsh.

        You have got guts to spill out in the open, for all to read. No one will do it. I admire you for this! And the boy is settled well too! I am not criticizing you for what you did in the past. Now you are a good father, a good son and a good husband. I like this face of you!

        I am getting ready to go for a wedding and here I am! Really, we are addicts, as Solilo said!

  4. Mystery says:

    OMG!! u actually posted all this!!
    you have guts man!
    the whole incident sounded scary.. most of u drunk and then stripping this guys clothes! good that the hotel management dint take it very seriously…
    Vishal..poor guy i must say..
    Are there more of such stories in your flashback??

    • hitchwriter says:

      Guts ??

      dont embarass me.. please… !!

      no stripping stories… !! but yes equally wild and guffawing stories… plenty of them… !! need to get the rolling… !! that way i can also re-kindle some memories…

  5. Solilo says:

    Your mood meter matches the post..you devil! 👿

    Poor guy! nangu-pangu in without shoes in a cold winter night. Ha..ha..ha.. so everyone drank and you smoked pot? Hooligans!

    But yes! all of us do things during college days some of which we regret and some is fun to reminisce. Whatever happened to this Vishal?

    When I was 14 I once slapped a 17 yr old guy and knocked off his tooth because he was trying to act smart of us. Those were my Taekwondo days. We knew his family and he was also embarrassed because I was a puny little thing. 😀

    • Solilo says:

      This post should be retitled as ‘Kaminey’ and let it go as a tag. 😆 It would be fun to read the mean side of everyone. *Solilo the angel speaketh* 😈

        • hitchwriter says:

          Tae Kwondo.. !! geez… you knocked of someone’s teeth.. and you call me a DEVIL ??????

          geez… !!

          While I love doing tags… I aint sure everyone tagged likes it… so its up to you… but since you are giving this idea.. you must surely do this… !!

          I have some horrific tales… !! being the wrong guy in the wrong place.. at exactly the wrong time !!!

  6. umsreflections says:

    The devil in you has come out. Is that all or is there more to it ????

    Poor Vishal… All you guys have really gone to the highest levels of devilism – as per your mood meter.

    As u said, there is a devil inside everyone and how much comes out depends on how domesticated you are. Otherwise, we should all be saints, what do u say ???

  7. anjugandhi says:

    seems you had lots of time in hand when you wrote it
    smoking,drinks, pot smoking reminded me of my college days ( before any one gets any ideas I never tried any one of them) but we had a group who used to sit in the last bench and used to roll out cigrattes with all the common drugs and we used to look at them in wonder and admire their guts

    • hitchwriter says:

      did have time.. on saturday was stuck in office without work…

      hey we werent smoking pot then.. just cigarettes.. !!

      yes in college in 3 years we attended only 7 lectures… !! yes 7 !! so i dont know what last benchers do…

      but i do know what canteen sitters do !!!!! 😛 😛

  8. Crafty Shines says:

    Wild & mean & unsensible streak!!!
    Omg u bet! 😛

    First of all… I love ur adda!!!! Damn, boys have so much fun!!!! The girls I knew, mostly just sat around and discussed boys, or makeup, or actors or other ppl!
    There was no activity!!! Only chatter all the time!!! 😛 😛

    Think again… a Sutli bomb could burst between your legs… or when you arent looking some one would sting you with his cigarette but… or suddenly some one would wring your neck just for the heck of it… or some one could bite on your skull.. just for fun !!!!!!!!

    Till I reached college! Hee haw haw! We hardly had time to sit and talk…we were all over the city! 😀

    But ur adda sounds fantastic and makes me all J!!! wud have loved to be a part of an adda like this!!!! Go anytime, and u will surely find someone there for company! Soooper!!!

    Yes that is the best part… ANY TIME you need company… you would find 3-4 guys and most times everyone is EVER_READY battery… !!! even if you have to travel for work for some boring stuff… 50-60 kms on bike… no need to go alone… go to Anna.. fetch some one.. “chal ek kaam karke aate hai… raste mein cigarette main pilaunga… !!”

    Well! Thanks for that name… I have a few candidates I’d like to christen! 😈

    a sutli bomb would burst between his legs… but he wouldnt go… he was to stay put…
    What persistence, I must say!!! He loved and valued u guys too much!!! :mrgreen:

    “abe quarter leke kaha jaa raha hai..”
    ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahahahahah!!!!!!
    geee.. u guys finished his benadryl???? U know, in school, I was addicted to benadryl… well, addicted means, if I saw the bottle at home, I wud take a sip every one hr!!!! sedative!!!
    I wud be suffeciently doped on benadryl till eve…. Finally mom stopped buying it! 😛

    it is a sedative… when i have cough.. i just take two spoonfuls at night… no probs in the night.. and you get up straight up in the morning.. !!

    Saale Sach Bol raha hu… tujhe lagta hai ke mujhe chad gayi hai… but such mein…Tu mera sabse acha dost hai yaa… !!!
    Gosh!!!!! True proclamations of love n friendship!!! I got drunk like once in my life, and I told a girl in my group exactly what I thought of her, and it wasn’t kind at all!!!! 😛
    called her a female doggie! And coming from me, she fell off her chair! 😀

    you mean BITCH ? rite.. that word sounds very offensive doesnt it.. female doggiee still sounds polite.. he he he… weird it is really..

    Stripped him, threw him out and he still came crying about the shoes!!!!!
    seriously the guy needs to relook at his priorities!!!!!!!!!! 😛 😛
    But that was mean! Funny to read surely!!! 😀 but the guy, as u have described, seems ok with all that humiliation! Money seems to be the concern here! 😆
    ROFL @ Ek joota toh hain na!
    😆 😆 😆
    Few other stories????? Dish them out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    The guy was sort of deserving i tell ya… and for more stories.. just … Hang on…

    Reputation? That’s an extinct bird!!! :mrgreen:
    I dunno about coming long way from those days… But me loves hitchu for all that he is today, and yes, for all that he was earlier also!! 😀 😀 😀

  9. Swaram says:

    ROFL 😆 U wanted to show u hv a criminal side too Hitchu 😉 Y this post 😛

    I feel very bd for him 😦 but y dint he run away before itself from this adda when he knew he ws being a scape goat! As though he njoyed being one 😛

  10. Purvi says:

    Initially I found it funny…but later on somehow started feeling little bad for the guy.
    I don’t know why he wanted to be in your ‘group’ so desperately…may be you were kind of ‘popular bunch’ …..but anyways…. I was also shocked when i read his argument about the 2400/- shoes and that he was fine with everything else…huh! a piece of work I tell you 😛

  11. Lively says:

    Oh yes, this tale makes you look like a Kamina. Though making him naked and stealing his shoes was a bit too much 😛 dont you think? Though I know many guys’ sense of humor is such, and early twenties are such. Having fun at the cost of others’ situation seems normal now. Though what a loser he has to be to be ready to go through all that.

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