Life at 31
Age 4 -20: School, Graduation
Age 20-30: Working with dad (just 5 hrs a day) in our retail store
Age 30 – to now: Working as Design and Content Manager
What do I have today?
1. Zero bank balance
2. No work experience (actual, real kind of work)
3. No professional degree
I wonder who I am and what I stand for today. Was never very enthusiastic about going to school, college …actually did not like the education system, just did not fit in it. (nobody at home had a clue of it). And fully well know it is no reason for me to have not got a professional degree as many of my batch mates have done wonderfully well with loads of hard work and perseverance. I just was not motivated enough and unfortunately was not in that kind of an environment. The others who too did not get into profession and work around me were getting married and starting their new lives. I also went thru that stage of meeting families and eligible men with whom one would want to settle down but just did not connect with any.
So today, I am neither out there capturing the world nor a wife/mother combo. It is so easy to blame parents, hurt people but I can’t do it, for its not me, me being the one who strongly believes that, only one person is responsible for ones life- the person himself.
Guys, all though the tone may sound all negative, like a weakling’s, a failed person, it isn’t. I am just taking the balance sheet of life (at age 30!! funny, isn’t it??) to analyze and do what needs to be done next. Life, like always and as its nature is, did bring in a lot of other things. I got exposed to a very different way of existence or living one’s life, of which I remember contemplating even as a teenager.
I accidentally bumped into a friend who took me over to a Yoga Center and from where there has been no turning back. I met people from different cultures, who were in different areas in their lives, people with their own stories and most of all this MAN who had chosen to drop off everything he had, to find out who he really IS. And who, in his journey did touch millions of lives.
Today if I have to jot down all that I really truly know; not what I have read or heard from other people.
1. One can only do things; the results are not for us to decide.
2. The best things in life are the ones which did not work out, no matter how badly one wanted them when swallowed fully in them.
3. Life is simply generous, easy and mind blowing!
4. Being one with oneself is the highest respect a man can show towards life.
5. The present moment is the most powerful, potent thing.
Other timeless truths which I’ve heard from enlightened gurus, read in scriptures of which I have no real experience, but have had a taste are:
1. Nothing from ‘outside’ can make one happy.
2. The world is merely one’s own projection.
3. ‘i’ is only an illusion. ‘I’ is the reality, the truth.
4. A human birth’s only purpose is realizing one’s true nature.
Now today at 31, am at crossroads as to what I should do?
a. Go back to school, get a professional degree (earn moolah to fulfill ones material goals, Also is one way of giving back to society)
b. As truth and happiness cannot be found outside, stay put.
c. Surrender, give into life, and take each day as it comes (as the result is not in our hands).
d. Pursue the truth as that’s the purpose of life.
As I am writing the above four lines I realize that none of the above are or need to be exclusive. Having done this exercise, I now know I need to go to school, get a professional degree, get into something intensive and experience that life for a while…
Will come up with another one like this in a year!
A friend who follows my blog very closely once after seeing me write wrote the above piece and sent it to me on email… I have been trying to get her to start a blog but she wont… this was written last year in September…
so I guess its time for another… what do you say guys… lets have ur reactions…