nevermind, because its my mind ! :|

There is a strange lull in my life these days, apparently, I have realised that when you become conscious almost every piece you type seems mediocre, not that I have been writing The adventures of Tom Swayer or 20,000 Leagues under the sea or Harry Potter or a novel that inspired a superhit movie although I must thank God that I didn’t inspire a movie coz otherwise I would have been bitching as well, the way things are these days. Anyways that apart coming back to the lull and the not so great quality of literature (can I call it that ?) I have been typing away, I used to enjoy simply being what I was, a looney, a bundle of desires or whatever you want to call me… definitely not a Bhai !!!! :mrgreen:

.

Then I guess as with all things in life it had to end and mind you I churned out 300 odd posts whether entertaining or rubbish or simply mad before this apparent block has actually struck. More than the block what I find most mesmerizing and am most unable to come to terms with is I just don’t feel upto it & all of a sudden it feels like reading blogs and commenting on them is an obligatory task. For me blogging always was and will remain about interacting and that makes things even more complicated for me. Why this sudden change, yes I know change is the only constant, but geez…. I cant even reason sigh ! 😐

.

This is the time when I guess people take a blog break or a hiatus and as much as I have tried I haven’t been able to do that either. Like Oscar Wilde said, I can resist anything but temptation, I guess when the great man wrote that line he knew that every now and then there will be nerds like me who have absolutely no will power. Who cannot decide something and stick to it !! I however used to take solace from the fact that atleast I had something in common with the great man. 😛

.

Another apt line for me by the way is, Once I make up my mind I am full of indecision. No I don’t just say that line again and again, I actually live it as a matter of fact. Surprised ?? Not me, not one bit and why play around, I have to be honest !! Who am I kidding ??? It is actually a fact !!

.

At times I feel like screaming my lungs out, sometimes I feel I should have a punching bag in my house, I would like Sunny deol in Ghayal just scream as loud as I can and keep punching away, coz at times I feel like punching the window pane or the door, no not the door !! Thankfully I haven’t lost it so bad and still have some hold over my senses, either that or may be I am scared of my wife, may be she will declare me a madman and disown me and probably that is what is preventing me from carrying out the madness. The bizzarest part is I don’t even know on whom am I angry, actually I am not angry !!! WTF 😡

.

Maybe its this phase of mine where I am to while away my time before I take my career by the scruff of its neck and launch it like Viru launches the ball over the thirdman boundary. Wonder where the metaphor’s are coming from ! Am I angry, am I constructing a post or am I actually trying to get a perspective of myself ??? Sigh I dont know actually…

.

Yesterday when I was running in the park with my son and I just loved the whole exercise, it seemed so very liberating, letting out all the unspent energy, conserved carefully playing Farmville, twittering, blogging…. I just wanted to keep running don’t know to where, we were in any case running in circles, unfortunately I eventually had to stop as my lungs and my body denied my mind. They both yelled at the top of their voice that I did rather stop or they might give up and and I had to give in….

.

How I wish life were a DVD and I just hope I had a remote control, I want to really fast forward life…. really badly…

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134 thoughts on “nevermind, because its my mind ! :|

  1. Meena says:

    Ah! never mind.. this phase will pass too! I was/am still feeling some thing of this sort.. though i believe i have a lot to be angry about.. am not really angry angry!

  2. Aarti says:

    🙂 u said it… but then someone also told me i have the remote and its upto me to control every aspect of life!! lemme know if u discover how to do that!!

    in the mean time dont push it, just go with the flow… am sure the phase will pass

  3. Smita says:

    Is it burn out? All I will say is don’t give this phase so much importance! You are unable to enjoy the blogosphere like old times, so what??? It is a phase which will pass!!! Simple!!!!

    Totally Stay away from the comp (only access work related sites) and see how well u will be cured in a week 🙂

      • Smita says:

        And Am scared & shivering with fear!!! huh!!!!

        In fact right now am looking forward to a month’s peace that is coming my way starting this month end 😉 😛

  4. Deeps says:

    I knw what you’re saying,Hitchy. I’m going through a similar phase of lull. I’m not even sure when I’ll be back to blogging like before. I guess this is the season 😀

    you said it..never mind! Just go with the flow and you’ll come out of it fine. Just live your life to the fullest and you’ll back in no time,doing what you’re best at….spreading happiness and smiles 🙂

    Heres something to cheer you up…

    • Vimmuuu says:

      Pal means teeth in malayalam !!! This song if translated bilingually has an amazing philosophy —- The teeth that is going to come, will one day go away ! 😀 😀 😀 😀

      Gawwd, I shouldnt be in this planet at all ! 😉

        • Deeps says:

          LOL,Pix 😆

          Vims was the teeth-reference to the song supposed to be a joke??? really?? ayyooooooo,please spare us…dont torture us like this ever again! I’m banging my head here!
          Go,get married,you need some serious lessons at cracking jokes 😈

            • hitchwriter says:

              No Vimmmmuu the sarcasm can only come after marriage… not from any book !!!! you wont know it till you do it… !! 😛

              Deeps… nope I wont ever quit blogging… and i dont think it was blogging but some of the lull’s in life…

              but then I thought why stay away from things that you most like in the lull… and so I am back… and yes humming that song surely helped !!!!!!! 😀 😀 😀

  5. Usha Pisharody says:

    Same here, Dhiren, and it’s been going for many months now ! So you see, there is hope, because I came back did I not? And I am here, as well well as where I want to be 🙂 🙂

    So, as with cycles in life, and circles you keep running in, this too will pass 🙂 Take it from one who has been there 🙂 🙂 (I can hear you go, Grrrr…. , I dont want to hear how it is with you, just let me be… lol!!!)

    Seriously, as Smitha has said, just stay away from the computer, go out, take a long drive (Ah!! luxuries :P)!!!!

    And takare 🙂 And God Bless!!

    • hitchwriter says:

      aah… Ushus the blessings definitely helped… and no… its not blogging… and I am sure this will pass… and while it is passing it is upto me to crib along… or be bright and make the most of the time… !

      lets try the latter out ! 😀

  6. Tara says:

    even in your frustration and confusion and indecision you have the words flowing so well to convey that.. I loved ur ramblin Dhiren 🙂 and to be honest i have not been reading many posts.. havnt read urs too.. i do think its a season 🙂

    be engaged and enjoy what you like better.. like i am playing those fast shots in badminton with amit these days and baking potatoes for his GM diet 😛

    Things do keep changin with time.. its natural n okay..

  7. Swaram says:

    Arre Hitchu … we luv ur writing just bcoz u write what u feel .. I luved this post too 🙂 U hv said it all straight from ur heart 🙂

    Hugs Hitchu … take a break and just be what u r .. every cloud hs a silver lining 🙂

    Sometimes, it does seem obligatory .. I think a lot abt it too … don’t stress urself .. read what u feel like, see what u like and comment where u want to … friends do understand … if they don’t, they r nt one 🙂

  8. umsreflections says:

    I hope that you’ve let out all the thots out, using this post.

    Now, you can be back to yourself !!!! 🙂

    Hitch, I loved that line – Once I make up my mind I am full of indecision – This is so like my S !!!! Anyway, you two being Saggis, its bound to be the same !!!

    S too is sulking abt this and that from time to time. It’ll pass on, as life moves ahead.

    Take Hetal and Hriday and go for long walks, talk with Hetal a lot – means non-stop – it’ll make ur heart light. As u said, running with Hriday made u feel better – do it again !! Play with him like a kid – let the childishness out – you’ll feel better —- Now, wait – am I sounding like Geet in JWM ????? hahhahha, I felt it 😆

    Take care, come back in your own time, but do come back. We miss you, here in blogoworld. 🙂 🙂 🙂

      • umsreflections says:

        Haven’t seen JWM ????? OMG !!!! And what do you mean – that properly ????? 🙄

        I’ve watched it so many times – that its pointless to count now. And my daughter loves the movie, so we have a DVD. And whenever she is bored, we all watch JWM !!!! ROFL !!!! 😆

        • hitchwriter says:

          I dont like Kareena all that much… though lately my opinion of her is changing slightly !!!

          Neither do I like Shahid too much… though even that opinion is slightly changing after Kaminey !!! 😛

  9. Indyeah says:

    (((hugs))) as so many friends here have said, this too shall pass Dhiren..
    it will:)
    you know what?
    its a lil bit of the weather…a lil gloomy, very less sunshine…(it actually gets one’s spirits down..scientifically proven 🙂 )

    this I dont feel like blogging phase will pass…just take it calmly..dont worry too much …dont write and dont bloghop if you dont want to…take the much needed rest and comeback raring to go:)

    in the last one year I have learnt that everything has a saturation point and blogging too has its own:)
    so write when you want to, comment when you feel like it…act loony, act the way you want to:)

    I believe in these lines:)

    Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. ~Hans Christian Anderson

    go get some sunshine and let yourself be free bro 🙂
    and let that smile come 😀 😀

    (((hugs))))

    • Solilo says:

      Indy, if you say SUNSHINE once more..I will kill you. Hahahaha Since morning sunshine sunshine laga rakha hai. Twitter pe, blogs pe…we know it is cold in Delhi. 😀

      • Vimmuuu says:

        LOL, is that so ??? glad im not on twitters ! 😀 😀 😀 Probably, thats the word she learnt during her vocabulary classes yesterday. S-U-N-S-H-I-N-E ! 😀 😀

      • Indyeah says:

        ROFL!!! how did I miss this? 😀

        brrrr…its darn cold here 😦

        yeah come to think of it! 😀 I do miss ssssss……..sunshine!!!
        bhagooo! 😛 😛 😀

        • Indyeah says:

          u know what? 😦
          I got so glum without the sun that I put up a sunflower field pic just to cheer myself up 😦

          send some sunnshiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine someone! 😥

          • hitchwriter says:

            Absolutely Di dont mind these two devils !!!! Sunshine is what we all need !!!! even Indore is freezing… !!!! but the sun has been out today and its a glorious day to start again… and more than blogging it was other issues and I realised I cant stay away from something that is so dear to me !!!!!! and so as they say I m back… in well 2 days…

            but seriously I lvoed everybit of attention I got !!!!!!! :mrgreen: 😀 😀

  10. masood says:

    Dude, pick up a cricket bat, ask anyone to bowl, take guard and play some delightful drives through the covers, midwicket, a few square cuts and some delicate leg glances……

    And if that does not feel good…just come down the wicket and go for it over long on and long off….

  11. Pixie says:

    Hugs Hitchu!
    All that I wanted to say, have been said so nicely by the others 🙂
    It’s just a phase.. it will pass 🙂

    Live each day to the fullest! Live, love and enjoy! 🙂 🙂
    God Bless you!

    Do what brings you happiness… the block or the feeling of obligation to write will pass too and you will be back as good as new! 🙂 🙂

    This post itself is proof enough that you write directly from your heart and that words flow as easily as ever!
    We will all be here, waiting for the next post, filled with sunshine and happiness!

    {{{hugs}}}

  12. Meira says:

    First things first: Are you crazy? We LOVE your posts!!!

    Second things second: Stop reading if you want to but mind you, when you log into your Reader 2 weeks from now and spot the 500+ unread posts, you will go into a frenzy 😛 Ok that was of no help whatsoever, right?

    Third things third: Taking a break is good fun. One gets a lot of material for future blog posts. And don’t worry, we’l let you know when something earth shattering happens here at blog land. read some books, play some board games, but enjoy 🙂

    • hitchwriter says:

      Guess your sympathies are veiled threats are they ???? lol !!! 😀 😀 😀 lol… !!! I wouldnt let the earth shattering things go by … !!!!! 😛 😛

      I simply cant ! 😛

  13. Vimmuuu says:

    Did vishesh bite you ?? I mean, what is this all of a sudden ???? Its just that stupid block where I had been last month. Dont worry, you will come out of it !!! do you want me to tag you for a few old tags ???? I mean, not the ones where you answer questins like what you wearing, etc. Real good tags. What say ???

  14. sakshi says:

    Aww is this the same person 😯 who told me “We have to sacrifice blogging while on vacation” when I called you up in India?? 😎 You know I had laughed so much when you said about sacrificing blogging 😆 I knew only a blog addict like you could say such a profound 😳 statement.

    You know what?? in this lull phase you have managed to weave the best post ever…so many beautiful sentences and words of wisdom from you…SIGH!!! Bhai :mrgreen: are you thinking of sanyas?? 😡

    Take your time and remember there are some crazy people out here who dance with a heavy heart on blogs while missing you…. 😥

    sobs…let me sacrifice a few tears and come back………

    • Vimmuuu says:

      He was doing a good thing to the society by asking you to sacrifice blogging for a while 😀 😀 😀

      ohhh those crocodile tears….gonna add the salt content to the sea behind you ….. 😀 😀 😀

      • Sakshi says:

        Hee Vims am letting you go as I see you are doing a last frantic attempt at crawling over every comment before you get married :mrgreen: Pavam Vimoose *credited to Don coz i don’t want to be sued* take advantage of the internet and blogs while it lasts for you 😥 these tears I tell you is 100% sponsored by Rakhi Sawant 😛 😆

        • hitchwriter says:

          Yess.. m the same persn… just got it wrong for a while… and screwed my thoughts for a while… instead of doing what I like so much and utilising this lull in life… I was infact trying to go away from it… geeeeeez… !!!!

          like I said… the thoughts I get are er… nvm… ! geez… i m saying that too often… !

          plus you know… once I make up my mind… I m full of indecision !!!

  15. shraddha says:

    i was just reading an article few days ago that average age of a blog is just 6 months!
    imagine!
    also long time back my husband showed me an article where being a professional blogger
    (like your chief blogger thing) is considered among top 10 most stressful jobs.

    I also am resisting things like farmville etc on facebook on daily basis.
    I know not accepting those invitations also is not a good idea but i do that as i can not have more online activities on my hand..

    i am also technically on a break…my friend eco meg did a post for me in jan…but other than that…i am only revitalizing old posts, all month of jan…the ones that do not have individual post PR inspite of being very loved and praised..

    if you do not feel like bloghopping…do things that will improve your blog…without doing a new post…

    also…i am past that phase where i feel doing a random post is fun…i feel doing a random post…polishing it with key words..learning from past mistakes..can also be fun..

    here are two things i will be changing in my old posts….

    1. my photos currently have names like” img0324″ but if you see highly ranked blogs..they name their images… “rain falling in delhi”…some even mention the px…

    2. i would link to sites on first line of my post…big mistake…first two three lines..should always be introduction…linking should not start beofre 5-6 lines..

    and things like that…
    do you know…if you make these changes…bots like google appreciate positive changes made on already indexed pages?

    as a friend i am telling…break does not have to be boring….be online still…just don’t do different things..

  16. Ashwathy says:

    first of all, we WILL mind, thank you very much… and especially because it is YOUR mind, hitchy…. 😡 hmm or perhaps the lack of it! 🙄 :mrgreen:

    secondly, be blessed that u can type away nonsense atleast from time to time. some of us cant even do that 😐 2-3 posts a month wud be considered lucky! :p

    Then I guess as with all things in life it had to end and mind you I churned out 300 odd posts whether entertaining or rubbish or simply mad before this apparent block has actually struck.
    300 odd posts in a year??? and u call that mind mindless??? 😯 u are out of ur mind!!! quite literally! :mrgreen:

    jokes apart hitchy… i think u r very VERY restless… and that is causing all this. as u said, all the unspent energy. u need something new. and i do not mean leave blogging. i think u shud be fine once u start shifting. its just that time until thats driving u mad, isnt it?

        • hitchwriter says:

          @ Ash – I know… the time will fly…. imagine i was gonna stop something that is going to help me kill this time… !!! how I botch up things at times… sigh !!!

          and I agree with vimmmuu a combo girl like that could really help… i mean I have to atleast try to know if she works or not… dont i ????? ❓

  17. Solilo says:

    Hitchy BHAI, Bole to mast rehne ka. Tension nahin lena ka. Jab man karega to likhna tab tak woh karo jo man ko acha lage. Uske baad bhi wohi karo jo man ko acha lage. 😀

      • Sakshi says:

        Hitchy I have a doubt ❓ Did you write this post after a conversation with Vims? 🙄 you know like the group post smita did after talking to him??

        Why is Vim2u6 replying to all our comments like he did on Smita’s group post 😀 Dal main kuch vimoose hai :mrgreen:

    • Indyeah says:

      ROFL!!!!

      😆
      See? Dhiren? even THE DON is wishing you well *no!no!dont faint* 😀 😀

      stop rubbing your eyes and follow DON’s credo to a T! 😀

      DON Ji? Aap ekdum raapchik DOn hain

      @Vimmuuu ye DON ka language ka HIGHEST standard hai :mrgreen:

      *runs before the DOn can catch her* 😛 😛

      • Solilo says:

        Pixer: Happy 2010 dear!

        Vimmooose: Don’t you have a blog of your own? Why the hell are you replying here? 😡

        Indy: SUNSHINE? Let me come to Delhi and give you some Sun%^^^^^%#$$%*^

        To Hitchy:

        Goli maar bheje mein..
        Bheja shor karta hai..
        Bheje ki sunega to marega Dhiru..
        Dhiru Bhaiyya..Dhiru Bhaiyyaaaaaaaaaa.

        Mwahahahahah 😈

    • hitchwriter says:

      SOLI !!!!!!

      Please aise waqt pe to kamsekam… jhooti humdardi dikha diya karo… !!!!!! aur please BHAI mat kahooooooo !!!!!! 😥

      and taking ur advice… will only do what mann ko acha lage !!!!! 😀 😀

      clinging hugsssssssssssss nevermind if your trying to run !!!!!!! 😛 😛 😛

  18. Pal says:

    Awww…dont be silly. Fast forwarding this phase would mean you miss out on quite a lot of stuff…like your little kumbhkarna…your travels…and most importantly, YOUR BLOGGING! So just hang in there, and enjoy your good health and happiness 🙂
    Best wishes,
    Naniji

  19. mandira says:

    herez some gyan.. its probably not wat u want rt now.. but its waht im going to give u anyway…
    patience is a GREAT virtue.. and it takes the life out of u to develop it.. very few ppl are born patient.. i think we learn patience as we go along life.. im learning it myself.. thats not to say im loving the learning process.. im in fact HATING it.. but as much as i’d like to take complete control of my life and turn it the exact way i want, to take it to a new phase,a different phase, it doesnt work that way… no fast fwd happens ya…so u wait.. and wait.. sab ka time badalta hai bhai.. tumhara bhi time aayega..(aur mera bhi!!!!!!!) hang in there! 🙂

    • hitchwriter says:

      gyaan is definitely what I dont need being the maha gyaani of all… sigh !!!!! 😛

      but I get your point… and ranting is giving me so much attention I almost now m thinking I must do this… !!!!!

      😀 😀 😀

  20. Nancy says:

    Honestly Hitchwriter….my sympathies with u!!!!
    I went thru something like this 2-3 months back & feel I havent gotten out of it yet.
    But there is something inside me which urges me not to give up….coz once I give into tht urge I know for a fact I’ll never come back. Does that make sense????

      • Sakshi says:

        Hitchyyyyyyyyyyyy I promise I will not call you the B word if you will come with me to Nancy’s place. She is on a killing spree *Gulp* and haunting down bloggers who didn’t visit her lately *sakshi bangs her head thinking why she didn’t peep at Reflections*

        • hitchwriter says:

          should I sing…

          Acha jee main haara… chalo main aata hoon aapke blog par… !!!!

          (sing in the same tune the following line)

          Now no point complaining about too many commmetns…

          Beta ji you asked for it !!!!!!!!! :mrgreen:

    • hitchwriter says:

      it surely wil Homey !!!! whats with that cake !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      geeeeeeez !!! 😛 😛 😛 😛 😛 never mind the funk… i want that cake !!!!!!! 😛 😛 😛

  21. mou says:

    i can relate to this feeling completely, the reason i took a break from blogging…the moment something becomes obligatory, the fun quotient vanishes…it’s like trying to force things back to the way they were and most of the times it’s futile…i would suggest being a bit impulsive, doing what you feel like doing for a while, not what you think you should do…and of course, do write whenever and whatever you feel like…after all, what are blog followers for :P…

  22. Sandhya says:

    Go and watch ‘3 Idiots’ once more, Dhiren! I am sure you will be OK!

    You are going to write a post on music, tomorrow! That is your most favourite subject, eh?

    Waiting to read…

  23. kanagu says:

    never worry bhai…. this is one of the best posts of you… so even you can write posts of this kind and we will be enjoying it..

    and when you have said that run thing… I thought about the Forrest Gump movie.. when he runs till he gets tired of it… 🙂 🙂

  24. Parul says:

    I am sure each one of us have gone through this phase at some time or the other in life and hence this too shall pass !!
    Just listen to your heart and enjoy the little things in life !!
    Oh, and the remote control, if you get it, can you send me the address of the store too? I need to get that one too 🙂

  25. Solilo says:

    Still no sign of return?

    hmm..

    One blogger to another blogger: *Sob* *Sob* You don’t send me any trackbacks these days. Are you blogging someone else?

    😆

  26. Sakshi says:

    Hmmm… so what’s up there in your mind hitchy? 🙄 You want all of us to write a petition, sign it and send it to Hetal to get you back to blogging :mrgreen:

    Me needs both my dancing partners back *sakshi throws tantrums like a two year old breaking the heels of her Jimmy Choo’s 😥 :shock:*

  27. Indian Homemaker says:

    I thought I was the only one!! I always made time for blogging but now though there is lots to do I feel if I rea[=-p”””’lly (My cat walked on the keyboard and did that) tried I would be able to make time to get back to blogging… but somehow there is always something else that seems unavoidable 😦 Maybe we all just need to give it some time.

    • hitchwriter says:

      I actually dotn have any thing to do… !!!!!!!! geez…

      even your cat i think wants to blog !!!!!!! or does it want me back ??????? 😛 😛 😛

      I aint giving it any more time !!!!!!

  28. Indy says:

    I think this is my first time here! came here fater ur comment on my blog! 🙂

    I have been though umpteen blogger blocks and thinking them to be permanent have even gone ahead and deleted some…only to regret it! I almost always can’t take it sfter a few weeks of oinline silence! So I suggest u hold on…give urself a break but please don’t stop…(besides I just got here…wud love to read some more posts of yours!)

  29. Just call me 'A' says:

    Hitchyyyy come back and write…what is this…no attempt to write for a guy with a blog title like ‘my attempt to write’….write something hitchy….take the tag Mon left for you…put up some random pic or get a guest post by hetal…ask her to put up some yummy recipe

  30. Amrita says:

    Hey!!!!
    Hum abhi abhi wordpress par aaye hain aur aap bhag rahe ho!!??….
    😉 LOL

    Hope you find that point of equilibrium where the stress you are feeling due to the “demands” of blogging is perfectly balanced out by the “returns” in the form of creative satisfaction and interaction with friends you have found on the net.

    Wish that you would go on writing.
    🙂

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